ࡱ> 46123` Njbjb $.ddH8<4,Ell",!RsƲƲƲƲƲ,ƲƲ` {.H 0E``#Ʋ#0ƲT[$P[ A Model for Teaching Writing to Struggling Writers Examples Anita L. Archer, Ph.D. archerteach@aol.com Example #1 (Rubric for Descriptive Paragraph) No Yes Not Evident Very evident 0 1 2 3 4 Fix-up Zone Descriptive Paragraph Critical Attribute YouTeacher(Organization)1. The first sentence tells what is being described.0 1 2 3 40 1 2 3 42. All the other sentences tell more about what is being described 0 1 2 3 40 1 2 3 43. The length is adequate.0 1 2 3 40 1 2 3 4(Sentences)4. Complete sentences are used.0 1 2 3 4 0 1 2 3 45. The sentences begin with different words.0 1 2 3 40 1 2 3 46. The sentences vary in length.0 1 2 3 4 0 1 2 3 4(Word choice)7. Descriptive words are used.0 1 2 3 4 0 1 2 3 48. Overused words (e.g., nice, big, little) have been replaced with more precise or interesting words. 0 1 2 3 4 0 1 2 3 4(Content)9. The description paints a clear and accurate picture of what is being described. 0 1 2 3 4 0 1 2 3 410. The description is easy for the reader to understand.0 1 2 3 40 1 2 3 4 Example # 1 continued (Descriptive Paragraph) It was dusk when we entered the tiny grocery store on the edge of the deserted road. The store was lit by a single bulb hanging near the entrance. The aisles in the store were narrow allowing only one shopper at a time. Ancient wooden shelves lining the aisles were cluttered with dust-covered cans and boxes. Yellowed labels on the cans held the secret of the store. Example #2 (Writing Frame for Beginning Writers) My favorite city is _________________. This city is located in the state of ________. I like this city because _________________ ___________________________________. One of my favorite things to do in this city is ___________________________________. Another activity that I enjoy in __________ is __________________________________ ___________________________________. Example #3 (Frames for Narrative Summaries) (Simple Summary) The main character in this story is ___________. The problem in the story is ________________ ______________________________________. This is a problem because _________________ ______________________________________. The problem is solved when _______________ ______________________________________. Example #3 continued (Frames for Narrative Summaries) ___________(title)_________ took place in _______(setting)_________. The main character was ______________(name)_______________, a__________(who)_____________. In this story, __________(name)_____________s problem was __________________________. He/she tried to resolve this problem by _______________. In the end, the problem was solved when ____________________________________. Example #4 (Expository Summary Frame) Canoes Canoes have changed over time. Native Americans made canoes from ___________ and _____________. To make canoes from birch bark, they had to _________________ _________________________. To make canoes from logs, they had to ___________________________. Today canoes are made from ________________. Example #4 (Expository Summary Frame) The Life of a Butterfly First, a butterfly lays an ____________. Next, the egg ____________________and out comes a ______________________________. The caterpillar eats ______________________ and grows. After a while, the caterpillar sheds its _______________________________and forms a ________________________________. After ten days, the chrysalis turns ___________ and __________________________open. Then a ___________________________ comes out. Example #5 (Writing Frame to Accommodate Emerging Writer) ______________________(State) ___________________ is a very fascinating state. It is found in the _______________________ part of the United States. It is bordered by the following states: ________________, ____________________, _____________________, and _________________________. ___________________________ has a variety of land and water forms. In terms of landforms, this state has _____________, __________________, _________________, and _____________. The most dominant landform is its _________________________. The largest lake in _____________________ is ______________. ______________________ also has a number of rivers including ______________________, ____________________, and __________________________________. ___________________________ has a diverse economic base. One aspect of its economy is agriculture. Some of the crops grown in ________________ include ______________________, __________________________, and ______________________. Its most important crop is _______________________________. Another aspect of this states economy is manufacturing. The following products are produced in _____________________: ________________________, ____________________________, and ____________________________. ____________________ is the product most often associated with this state. If you visited this state and purchased either an agricultural or manufacturing product, you would probably buy __________________________. There are many recreational opportunities in ____________. First, there are a number of large state and federal parks. My favorite park is ___________________________. This park would be a great place to visit because _____________________ ____________________________________________________. These are some of the recreational activities you might enjoy in _____________: ______________, ____________________, ____________________, and _________________________. Of these, I would particularly enjoy _____________________. One thing that this state is noted for is ______________ __________________________________________________. This is noteworthy because ___________________________ __________________________________________________. However, I thought the most interesting thing about this state was _________________________________________. Example #6 (Writing Frame for a Story-Problem Explanation) In this problem, we were asked to figure out ________________ _____________________________________________________. Some information was already given including _______________ _____________________ and ____________________________. When creating a plan to solve this problem, I decided to follow a number of steps. First, I _________________________________ _____________________________________________________. Next, I _______________________________________________ _____________________________________________________. Then, I _______________________________________________ _____________________________________________________. Finally, I _____________________________________________. After following these steps, I determined that answer to this problem was __________________________________________. To check this answer I __________________________________ _____________________________________________________. Based on my verification of the answer, I am quite certain that it is accurate. Example #7 (Using a strategy to write paragraph summary. This is taken from REWARDS PLUS.) Step 1. LIST (List the details that are important enough to include in your summary.) Step 2. CROSS-OUT (Reread the details. Cross out any that you decide not to include.) Step 3. CONNECT (Connect any details that could go into one sentence.) Step 4. NUMBER (Number the details in a logical order.) Step 5. WRITE (Write the paragraph.) Step 6. EDIT (Revise and proofread your answer.) Example # 7 continued Greek Theater began as a religious ceremony honored the Greek god Dionysus beliefs in Dionysus began to spread southward choruses chanted lyrics actors joined the choruses the Dionysus festival in Athens became a drama competition amphitheaters were built performed tragedies that taught lessons performed comedies that made fun of life declined when playwrights died and the government changed Example #7 continued The roots of modern theater can be found in early Greek theater. Greek theater began as a religious ceremony that honored the Greek god Dionysus. At first, choruses chanted lyrics. When actors were added to interact with the chorus, theater was born. Later, the Dionysus festival in Athens became a drama competition, and amphitheaters were built to accommodate the event. Both tragedies, which taught lessons, and comedies, which made fun of life, were performed. Greek theater declined when the great playwrights died and the government changed. Example #7 continued Rubric- Summary Student RatingTeacher RatingDid the author state the topic and the main idea in the first sentence?Yes Fix upYes NoDid the author focus on the important details?Yes Fix upYes NoDid the author combine details in some of the sentences?Yes Fix upYes NoIs the summary easy to understand?Yes Fix upYes NoDid the author correctly spell words, particularly the words found in the article?Yes Fix upYes NoDid the author use correct capitalization, capitalizing the first word in the sentence and proper names of people, places, and things?Yes Fix upYes NoDid the author use punctuation including a period at the end of each sentence?Yes Fix upYes No Example #8 (Compare/Contrast) Compare/Contrast Think Sheet Subject: SAME Groups Categories      DIFFERENT Groups Categories       Example #8 continued Compare/Contrast Think Sheet Subject: SAME Groups CategoriesSt. BernardNewfoundland Use Rescue Rescue HeightFull grown males sameFull grown males same Type of FurSmooth dense that protects from cold Smooth dense that protects from cold    DIFFERENT Groups Categories Weight 155 170 pounds 140 150 pounds Place of Origin Swiss Alps NewfoundlandDifferent Clients Climbers and skiersPeople in Atlantic Ocean  Example #8 continued The Saint Bernard and the Newfoundland are the same in several ways. Both dogs are large rescue dogs. The full grown males are about the same height. Both dogs have smooth dense fur that protects them from the cold while they are rescuing people. Although the two dogs are similar, they also have differences. The Saint Bernard is much heavier, weighing 155 to 170 pounds. The lighter Newfoundland weights 140 to 150 pounds. The dogs originated in different places, so the types of rescues they perform are different. The Saint Bernard originated in the Swiss Alps and rescues climbers and skiers from the snow. The Newfoundland rescues people form the Atlantic Ocean. Both dogs perform important services for mankind. Reference Stephanie Gray and Catharine Keech. Writing from Given Information: Classroom Research Study No. 3. 1980. Bay Area Writing Project. Berkeley, CA: University of California. Example # 9 Essay Essay Rubric Author Essay Topic Question Student or Partner RatingTeacher Rating INTRODUCTION Does the introduction tell the topic of the essay? Does the introduction tell the authors position on the topic? Does the introduction tell the authors major points? Does the introduction interest you in reading the essay?  Yes No Yes No Yes No Yes No Yes No Yes No Yes No Yes NoBODY Does the body include at least three major points that support the authors position? Does the author elaborate on and explain each of the major points? Are the paragraphs well-organized and easy to understand? Are linking words used to connect the paragraphs?  Yes No Yes No Yes No Yes No  Yes No Yes No Yes No Yes NoCONCLUSION Does the conclusion restate the authors position? Does the essay have a definite conclusion? Yes No Yes No Yes No Yes No WRITTEN MECHANICS 11. Did the author correctly spell words? Did the author use correct capitalization? Did the author use correct punctuation?  Yes No Yes No Yes No  Yes No Yes No Yes No Example 9 continued Thanksgiving A Day of Gratitude (Introduction) My favorite holiday is Thanksgiving for a number of reasons. First, Thanksgiving gives me an opportunity to visit and play with friends and family members. Of course, Thanksgiving is also a great day to enjoy a variety of wonderful foods. In addition, it is a chance to stop and express gratitude for the richness of our lives. (Body) First, Thanksgiving affords me the gift of gathering with friends and family members. Normally, I celebrate Thanksgiving on the Friday after the official holiday. Twenty-five to thirty-five people generally attend my Thanksgiving party. My guests include my sister and her family and an array of friends from across the country. We spend much of our time just visiting, but we also engage in numerous activities. For example, we entertain each other by telling a story, playing the piano or guitar, or singing a song. Guests who dont want to perform make up the attentive audience. As a group, we also sing traditional Thanksgiving songs and hymns. After eating, we play games, go on a group stroll through the neighborhood, and continue our conversations. Thanksgiving is not only an excellent time to enjoy friends and family members, it is also a wonderful time to EAT. You should see the buffet table at our Thanksgiving party. Of course, we have all the traditional foods: turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, and gravy. In addition, we always have a variety of vegetables and a Pacific Northwest specialty, salmon. The guests usually bring the desserts including pies, cakes, and cookies. My favorite Thanksgiving food may surprise you: bread covered with gravy. Late at night, once my guests have turned off their lights, I slip back to the kitchen for my private snack. I tear a piece of bread into small pieces, cover it with gravy, heat the mixture in the microwave, and sit down for the final feast. But most importantly, I love Thanksgiving because I take time to reflect on my life and express gratitude for my abundance. Even as I prepare for Thanksgiving, I contemplate my many blessings. As I set the table, I remember many of my relatives: my mother who gave me the salt and pepper shakers, my grandmother who once cherished the pitcher with an autumn leaf design, my sister who brought me the blue serving dish for this party. As I prepare the food, I am reminded of all the gifts that I have in my life that others lack: joyful work, abundant food, the shelter of a house, and warm clothing. My final preparation activity, creating floral arrangements for each of the tables, always carries me into deep gratitude for the beauty of nature. And then my friends arrive and I experience the greatest blessings of my life. (Conclusion) As you can see Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. But it should also be your favorite for Thanksgiving is the only holiday that will never disappoint you. On Christmas, you may not get the gift you hoped for. On Valentines Day, you may not have a girl or boy friend. On the Fourth of July, the fireworks may be cancelled due to dry conditions. However, on Thanksgiving, you expected turkey and you got it! Example #10 (Short Story) Think Sheet Story (6) Title  (3) Setting (1) Main Character(s) (2) Problem (4) EventsBeginningMiddle (5) End Example # 11 (Personal Narrative Think Sheet) Autobiographical Incident Think Sheet Title Incident Setting (4) Events in order Lesson learned Example # 11 continued Autobiographical Incident Think Sheet (5) Title Give Heart Incident Fifth grade with Mrs. Finkle -- Heart pin (3) Settings Mountain View Elementary School 1. Arrive at Mountain View.2. Difficulty adapting to new fifth grade class.3. Decided to be silent.4. Mrs. Finkle was kind and caring. Talked to me. Patted my back. Smiled at me.5. Class got better. Made friends. Participated in class.6. Mrs. Finkle caught heart pin in hairnet.7. Helped Mrs. Finkle remove pin.8. She gave me the pin and told me to give heartas a teacher.9. Today I wear on Valentines Day.10. Wear hearts every day and try to give heart. Lesson learnedGive heart to all people. Show love and care. Example #11 continued Give Heart Being a teacher was not even a consideration at the time, but Mrs. Finkle, my fifth grade teacher, taught me my first lesson about teaching. Even now, it is the lesson that I try to practice every day. Mountain View was the second school of my fifth grade, the eighth school of my short school career. After so many moves, the prospect of making new friends, of learning about a new teacher, of once again learning the classroom routines, brought me to total silence. For an outgoing person, silence was a new experience. I just didnt want to try again. However, Mrs. Finkle was not about to lose my mind or soul. I will never forget the little things she did each day to reach out to the silent one: talking with me as we lined up for music, patting my back as I worked on math problems, quietly praising my efforts, writing comments on my papers. Best of all, when I was reading or working, I would look up and there would be her smilegreeting me, making me feel safe. Gradually, the scary life of fifth grade in a new school began to fade. I did make friends. I did begin to talk in class. I began to write long stories and to read them to my class. All of this occurred because of the love and care shared by Mrs. Finkle. And one day, she shared a symbol of that love. It was right before recess and most of the kids were already out the door. Mrs. Finkle and I were both at the cloakroom pulling on hats, gloves, and coats as protection against the February cold. As she put on her coat, Mrs. Finkle caught her hairnet on her red heart pin that always rested on her collar. After struggling for a moment, she beckoned, Anita , would you help me. Soon I had separated the heart pin from her hairnet. However, instead of replacing the pin, she handed it to me and gently directed, You take it. You will be a teacher someday. Remember to give heartalways. Forty years later, I wear that heart each Valentines Day. But everyday, I wear at least one heart and try to remember her message as I teach. Give heart. Thanks, Mrs. Finkle. 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