Working with People with Hearing Loss: Video 7 Transcript



Working with People with Hearing Loss: Mental Health Practitioner Online Training

Video 7

Description of Individual in Video:

Dr. Sam Trychin is an elderly Caucasian man, with shoulder-length silver hair combed back from his face and caught in a ponytail at the base of his neck. A small hearing aid is barely visible in his left ear. He is wearing a dark blue sport coat with a solid-colored pale green dress shirt with a collar that is unbuttoned at the neck. He has a gold ring on the little finger of his right hand and a dark narrow band tattooed on his right wrist. He is a very animated speaker and frequently gestures with his hands to emphasize important points.

Video Transcript:

Dr. Trychin: Well there are three essential problems that I think communicatively that people of hearing loss experience. One is you didn't get my attention before you began to talk so I didn't even know you were talking to me. So I'm not gonna understand what you're saying ‘cause I don't have a clue that it's even happening.

The second thing is, you say something to me and I don't understand what you're saying and I know it. That's not a problem for me ‘cause I know what to do to correct it. It's a problem for a lot of people of hearing loss ‘cause they don't know what to do to correct it.

The third thing is you say something to me and I thought I understood you but I didn't. That's when we both have a big problem. That's when you come up to me on Thursday night at 7:15 and say “why aren't you dressed yet?” I say “what do you mean, why am I not dressed yet?” “I told you last week we’re going to the Joneses at 7:30 tonight for dinner.” “Oh, I didn't get that.” “Oh, yeah, you said, you shook your head, you said that you under…” We’re in a fight – very common. Right?

So some examples of the problem with misunderstanding when I think I got it right and you think I got it right and I didn't. One example, how I got onto this, was listening to the radio one time. This goes back to when Bill Clinton was running for president the second time. I'm listening to the radio and I hear the announcer say: “Voters don't like politicians who take aspirin.” And I thought “Whoa…what a weird poll that is.” [Laughing] I mean they go into people's medicine cabinets to see what they're taking and see whether they’re gonna be a Democrat or…that’s not right. So I listen a little more carefully and it was apparent to what the person had said was “voters don't like politicians who take action.” And I thought, “look at that.” Look at what my brain just did to me. I heard the “a,” I heard the “n” and it filled in the gap with the word from my lexicon that starts with “a” and ends with “n.” It wasn’t voluntary. I didn't say to myself, “hey, I heard ‘a,’ I heard ‘n.’” “What's a good word for that?” No it happens automatically, instantaneously and non-voluntarily.

That's the source of misunderstandings. And so, then I got interested in that. And so one time I'm in a…I had just flown into Los Angeles to do a weeklong program in Riverside, California. So a car came to pick me up. And a woman who was part of the group and I was gonna be workin’ with for a week is sitting…I'm sittin’ in the back seat next to the window; she is sittin’ in the middle and then another person was sitting on the other side of her. So we’re driving back to Riverside, it's gonna be awhile, an hour and a half, I don't know how long it was. But, so I decided I needed to make some conversation with this person so the trip is less boring. Right? So we passed this building and I turned to her and I said “hey, what's the name of that building?” Then she said “it's not very far.” “Oh,” I said, “wait a minute, now wait a minute. I don't think you understood what I just asked. Little while ago, we passed a large building and I wanted to know its name.” And she said “it's not very far.” She's getting angry and now I'm getting angry. So I said, “I want to resolve this. About a mile ago we passed a large tower-like structure and I want to know its name.” And she said “it's Knott’s Berry Farm.” So the issue is about misunderstanding is that I was convinced that she was wrong…she had misunderstood me. And that I had correctly understood what she said. I would've bet at that point a thousand dollars that I was right and she was wrong.

So this is what happens with misunderstanding. You are convinced that you got it right. So what's the solution? It's tough. There's only one solution. I have to feed back to you what you said to me. It's hard. It slows everything down a little bit. It has to make me conscious all the time of what's going on conversationally. I don't want to repeat…repeat back to you like a parrot every word you said. But key details, I need to feed back. You said “Thursday night at the Joneses at 7:30 for dinner?” Now, if I got something wrong, you can correct it. If I don't do that, you'll never know if I got it right and I'll never know I got it right until Thursday rolls around at 7:30. You think it's easy for people to do that? It's very difficult for people to do it.

That's why they get people into a group that meets every week for a couple of hours and practice, practice, practice, practice over time. Then you begin to get some skill in doin’ that. We have a friend that’s out in the Portland, Oregon area who’s so good at doing this. You don't even notice it. You don’t even notice it. He's excellent.

Another example – Knott’s Berry Farm is a kind of a humorous example - but there is another one less humorous that just happened recently. A woman told me that she went to the White House with her husband who has a pretty heavy-duty hearing loss and they're gonna do a White House tour. And they are in the basement of the White House with the tour guide waiting for permission to go upstairs to the first floor to go around and so he starts to open the door and they are ready to go. And a security person comes down and pushes in and says “No, no. Don't go upstairs. Don't go upstairs. Obama is on the first floor.” And the husband almost fainted - almost fainted. Turned pale. He got weak and she had to grab him because what he heard was “A bomb on the first floor. A bomb on…” So that's not so funny.

So, the point is that, you know, people that have hearing loss are vulnerable to this kind of stuff by the time they get up in the morning until the time they go to bed at night. There's always something that could be difficult…could create difficulty, and it contributes to the fatigue that we see in people and the fatigue goes with hearing loss. If you're tired, you're gonna be pooped in the sense of that you’re not gonna have the energy to do the kind of thing you need to do in order to effectively manage your hearing loss.

So it's really critical for people that have hearing loss to do all the stuff they need to do to reduce the fatigue. Make sure you get enough sleep. Make sure you're eating the right food. Make sure you get exercise. You know, the same old litany that we get hit with all the time from a variety of sources. But it’s very important for people who have hearing loss. And this business about misunderstanding really can be the killer because if the boss says to you “don't go over $15,000 on the Smith contract” and you heard “$50,000” and you signed the contract for $30,000 thinking you got a good deal, you may have lost a job.

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